diwali it is

Happy diwali.
Its my second consecutive diwali away from home.. is it just the beginning of a trend that is to follow?

Into the world that promises to deceive

Finally am placed. The purpose of joining a B school has been served. And Its back to the place where i came from. I dont know if this is what i wanted but i am sure i could not have asked for more.. oh hang on..hmm.. yeah ...i am sure... atleast kinda...

am i happy.. am i not. am clueless. My previous stint in the corporate world was just for timepass. cos i had nothing else to do and i hated to be a part of the unemployed lot of the country. But this time it does not seem to be a place where i can hang out till i feel like and return to the world of irresponsibility.... UTOPIA they call it. I just cant see myself forever and a day in a world of 'deadlines' and 'targets'. May be i ll end up enjoying it. You never know.. I have six more months to live my life for who knows whats in store in the days to come.till then.......am jobless.. am i? man... i jus got a job

But when the self speaks to the self, who is listening?

i toddled and tottered
down the lonely road
the sun ablaze
bemocking raze
rambling upwind
trying to unwind
all my bootless attempts
they deceived me..
they told me i would find an answer
the eternal conflict of the mind and soul
i dug in deep.. deeper.. to the depths of nihility
i am as confused now as i was before

From the first rain to the second

"Still falls the RAIN, dark as the world of man, black as our loss, blind as the nineteen hundred and forty nails upon the Cross"



Its been a year since the 'first rain'.


My first rainshot in my new canon... the feeling of surrendering myself to the force of nature.. the feeling of trying to keep my eyes wide open against the pouring droplets... a feeling of a bear hug with the sky.....

So much has changed over the last 1 year.


Here comes the rain again. as beautiful as ever.. as whimsical as ever. I have nothing to say or give back. I love walking in the rain.. cos then no one knows am crying.




"Raindrops like in-laws' brawl. Standing there an envelope with no address on. I am at the bottom of the ditch. I am trekking the trail of dirt. I am fried at the core of hell. I have been a roach, a bug, a shameless dog. Begging crawling begging crawling sinking. Yet I dared to dream once. Yet I dare to go too far once. Once is a was. I is an am. The rain falls down noisily down dragging me down burying me down mocking me I am a clown. I dream of me. I dream of bleeding hearts becoming I and me and mine"...

mOuSe HuNT

This post is dedicated to the rat which spoilt my lunch.

no different from any other day , but for the fact that i was voraciously hungry, khali and me were having lunch in the terrace gardens. i had ordered for rice wid sambhar and rasam. it was a gloomy day. it looked like rain but it didnt rain till then. as i was happily gobbling there was one big drop of water (or so i thought) dat splashed on my hand and my plate. i gave this really flabbergasted look at khali and wondered why on earth wud he do this to me... when he reacted innocent i diverted the look to the rain gods above and very baronially looked at the office server and commented on the holes in the roof. I bet he wud ve thought i was the biggest nincompoop on earth as the sky was clear. my great friend khali was wise enough to spot a rat/ mouse/some disgusting creature on the roof pipe fleeing from the crime site.

there i dropped the food which had almost found its way into my oesophagus , on my plate and washed my hands wid dettol. Khali remained oblivious thru out the course of action. Thanks man. if not for him , U wud ve seen me in some hospital sufferin from diarhhoea.

It would ve been just another day of my summer internship at bangalore if not for mr.creature.

"There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't."

IP : @#$ . #$% . ^&. *%#
cONNECTION sPEED : aBYSMAL
dOWNLOAD cAPABILITY : NON- EXISTENT
mEMORY Allocation : N/A

This is exactly how the executive summary of my first RDBMS class would look like. All of a sudden i felt the whole world becoming a tangent to my cerebrum/ cerebellum (cant really take the pains of confirming the word). Suddenly i felt it was all greek and latin to me. Suddenly i felt the dumbest of heads had a million times more powerful antennae than that of mine. Coudln help myself from falling on d desk. a sudden thud and the class would turn back to see if anyone had fallen off. In a self-effacing manner i would also turn my head to avoid further embarassment (as if the class was unaware of the source of the noise). The 'IF' written on the board is interpreted as 'interface' by all the other less technically challenged mortals in class.

You would be wondering why on earth did i have to opt for RDBMS as a credit course in my MBA prog.

I knew i was technically challenged. i just wanted to remove any trace of doubt that remained.

fire at one end and a fool at the other

To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know because I've done it a thousand times. ~Mark Twain

All my bootless attempts to understand one's addiction to smoking... The funny part of it being the explanations offered by smokers .. it is either loneliness or the fun of being with friends (invariably all smokers)... i dont see any other possible or plausible situation. If you do please enlighten me.

I dont see a difference between a full cigar and ten drags from different people around.
I dont see a difference between sMOkin thru the lungs or blowing the smoke off thru the nose.
I dont see the difference between ... no matter anything for that matter.

Thank you for Not Smoking. Cigarette smoke is the residue of your pleasure. It contaminates the air, pollutes my hair and clothes, not to mention my lungs. This takes place without my consent. I have a pleasure, also. I like a beer now and then. The residue of my pleasure is urine. Would you be annoyed if I stood on a chair and pissed on your head and your clothes without your consent?

This is defintely not what i want to say. not the least bit.

.... but try to understand... that i do care.

happy birthday to me

cakes.. party.. gifts... blah blah blah....

it has never been that sort in my case. am not sure to be happy or not so happy or whatever. birthdays don make a big difference at all. infact i feel kinda shy when someone calls to wish :/ ... and invariably i end up sayin "same to you"... lol... its just another day for me. probably it reminds my mother that am nearin nubility (not sure if that word exists). infact i ve always felt more busy and occupied during the remaining 364 days. all the excitement or hype or build up.. dies down the moment this day dawns. i just hate it. quite frustrating... and hence this post.

happy birthday to me

repercussions of big 'b'

for all those who might have thought this to be an extension of my blog name........ for all those who might have expected some bachchan material... for all those with other rather straight (pun definitely intended) intensions....

am sorry. this is nowhere close to your expectations. By now you would have realised that its got everything to do with THE 'B'OSS. and the boss was nowhere close to my expectations. A typical shankar movie, Sivaji had not much in store for rajini fans. I dont mind admitting that i enjoy his movies (though 99% of it defies the laws of gravity, motion... no matter whatsoever for that matter... am weak in physics). The gripping screenplay of padayappa or baasha was entirely missing in this movie. Though i hate to admit... Shreya was brilliant.. i definitely didnt refer to her acting. All credits to Rahman, Tharani and the crew.

No doubt its a blockbuster hit. for we people can do anything for the boss. even if it means removing our brains before entering the hall.

have a break. have a kit kat

out of sight out of mind... they say.

thanks to my parents who lead a netless life in chennai. This post is just to check the pulse of my blog. ten more days to re enter the world of eter-net. till then....

the k-factor

as my friend who is currently posted in Russia puts it.. Ekta kapoor is probably infuenced by the Russian K factor which has proved to be lucky for her hitherto. i believe in luck.. how else can i explain the success of some people i detest??? but check this out:

"Kyunki Tulsi Virani dies today " - After reigning as the most popular bahu on Indian television for seven years, the character of Tulsi Virani in the serial Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi will die in Wednesday's episode.

This was the headlines in one of the leading news channels. I am seriously starting to feel the indian media is running short of facts or matters that require to be featured.

there is violence engulfing rajasthan and punjab, elections storming goa, rumours clouding the BCCI, markets meandering its own course ... this is just to name a few over and above the usual myseries that embrace the daily routine of our country and its countrymen. i dont mean to say that emphasizing and reiterating the same gruesome issue would convalesce the situation.. but am sure that these kinda headlines is the last thing the country wants.

alice !!? alice !!? who the f*** is alice????

Everyone knows what a hypocrite is... That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR.

We have just eight years to save planet Earth from a climactic catastrophe, says a UN report. So as conservation and awareness become the buzzwords, could Internet have stayed behind? Google has done its bit to save energy by launching Blackle (or Black Google) – a Google search page that saves energy!Google claims logging on to Blackle (www.blackle.com) will save 750 MegaWatt of energy because the screen is predominantly black.

BULL SHIT!!!! man.. these guys know how to find a place in the front'page'. what can we call them... globetrotters?? swashbucklers?? or rather.. artful dodgers???

am sure The American Council for an Energy-Efficient Economy (ACEEE), Green Apple Awards for Environmental Best Practice, Nemex energy manager of the yrear awards, ES Environmental manager of the year award, Energy globe award... and no matter anything for that matter have already done the needful.


Moral of the story : seize the moment. act as if you really care. else you would have nothing else to do but to resign to the quote "I am Al Gore, and I used to be the next president of the United States of America."


P.S. thanks to google for some useful links : /

what do you think i did during 'summers'?

My diary should have looked somewhat like this:

14th april : last day in college, MBA 1st year
16th april : Joining date, iDeCK, Bangalore

Duration : 2months
Purpose : Summer project
Title : Infrastructure consulting
Area : Finance, Tourism
Projects : -Financial model, Ayurvedic spa resort in Mangalore
- Strategy for existing KSTDC properties
- Heli tourism pllan in karnataka
- other ad hoc stuff

15th june : presentation of report and thesis. and pack off.

My diary looks somewhat like this:

16th april : land in bangalore
20th april : board a bus to mangalore
21st april : Pilikula wild life resort
22nd april : ullal
23rd april : office
28th april : bus to chennai
30 april : permission, extend the weekend
1st may : world wide holiday.. tired of slogging u c

2ndmay : back to work
5th may : spiderman
6th may : bannerghatta , wild life safari
7th may : work
12th may : Chunchi falls, mekedatu, sangama.. rock and falls
13th may : good german, inox
18th may : bus to coorg
20th : coorg, napoklu, virajpet
21st may : back to work
23rd may : shimoga, jog falls
26th -27th may ; mysore.... with relatives (friends were not free that weekend)

2nd june : aerosmith concert
3rd june : ooty
4th june : back to work

9th &10th june : watch out in my posts to come

15th june : tickets booked for return journey. end of summers.

oops! i forgot... some dates have failed to find a place in my diary ... i seriously cant recollect what i did then.

P.S. : logic enthusiasts can form an algorithm with my weekend pattern

i hate blogging

oh well.. did i say that?? may be i used to. but certainly not now.

The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than be saved by criticism...

how bout dinner at Charing Cross, OOty?

You must be wondering about the title of this post.well..I myself am. It so happened like this:

Saturday night was the aerosmith show. The show was good (Poor aerosmith takes the backseat as i have more interesting stuff to share). The turnout was close to 30000. So by the time we got outta d place it was pretty late. We had to drop a girl at Hebbal (northernmost of bangalore). My friend and i had some plans for the next day. We were too hungry and set out to have dinner at 2 AM in koramangala.. and to our surprise.. the least waiting time was 2 hours in the restaurants at this godly hour. We had dinner (or so it may be called) at 3 30. and walked like nomads at that hour. We had a car and hence were intending to do a small picnic or atleast meet a coupla friends the next day. at 10 in the morning i was busily browsing for some one day picnic spots. we were 5 in number. Suddenly this place called Bandipur popped up in the screen.It was 210 kms away.(70 kms from mysore). Our plan:

1.30 hours to mysore. 1.30 hours to bandipur. reach there by 3.. start at 4. be back by 7.Then the chennai gang head back to chennai by 12. (man can only propose....)

we could start only by 12 :/ .. and the roads in Bangalore are so @~#$@$#ed up dat we hit mysore road (mind you.. not mysore. mysore road.) at 1.30. We reached Mysore at 3 30 and finally reached Bandipur at 5 30. It turned out to be a beautiful place.Everything was grazing around ...elephants, sambas, deers... monkeys.. bores.. the safari closes at 6. and we cudn make it to the safari either. We had to do something more.. for the 4 hour drive deserved something more.The staff there casually said "mudumalai is only 9 kms away"....we were like: "WHAT??? MUDUMALAI??? MAN THATS TAMIL NADU... WHOA!!!!!!" We hit the Ooty main road and reached Mudumalai.What a feeling to cross the karnataka check post and enter tamil boundary.... (oh man. i can imagine how it feels at the Wagah border).
It was nauture at its wildest. Fantabulous river and elephants abluting in them. we reached past the safari timings.We were just so excited and thrilled that this board couldn have eluded us "MASINAGUDI 7 KMS". So we headed for masunagudi.great drive.. great roads. epitome of verdance (pardon me for the introduction of this new word in the dictionary). We stopped everywher to capture the elephants/ deers/ sambas... etc in our cameras (ofcourse). we were prohibited from parking anywhere, honking, making noise. So this complete state of tranquility prevailed.Once we reached Masinagudi at 7 ish it started getting cooler. It was Tamil everywhere.The home feel :) .. we pinched ourselves .. we jus cudn believe we were on the better half of the border... probably we pinched ourselves too early.. Cos in the next 1.5 hours we were havin dinner ... Hotel Charring Cross, OOTY.How could we not visit Ooty when its just 30kms from masinagudi. :D

It was cold... quite cold... very cold rather.We were wearing cotton clothes (for .. who knew we would land up here).it was smoke emanating from 3/5 sensory organs. That was the closest we could get to smoking.Bought some chocolates.Had a sumptuous dinner. walked down the Ooty streets. I still cant believe... this being my first time visit to Ooty. It was 10 ",1]
It was 10pm.Then came suggestions from some of us .. "Hey, connoor s jus few kms amay.. what say???... we can then hit coimbatore and return to bangalore via plains. It will be a complete circle." At that moment nothing seemed implausible to us.We decided to take the road less travelled. lol. Via the jungle and Pycara falls.Thats risky and dangerous.We couldn have retuned via masinagudi(though that would ve saved another 30 kms) cos travel after 8pm and before 6am was prohibited. We started from Ooty. There was no sign of civilisation or human beings. Bad roads.Wild animals staring into the head lights. No visibility. too foggy. moonlight making it all the more eerie.Whenever we spotted two blinking eyes.. we would stop the car.. face the headlights towards them and take photos. One such encounter was wid a huge bison.my friend said bisons were foolish animals. and we believed. went right next to bison and took a head on snap. and the animal was really fooolish. It posed.... the next encounter was even worse. An elephant. right ahead of us. we dared to park the little indica next to d elephant and take snaps.and from outta nowhere two more elephants gazed at us from behind. WHOA...PHEW!!!!! escape. we flee immediately. ALLL THIS HAPPENED AT 1AM... Then we entered the Tiger zone.. Bandipur. sadly we were not lucky enough. We den entered Karnataka... and then mysore and den bangalore at 4 30 am. The chennai gang left at 8 30 am..here typing this post in my office, RMV Extn, Sadasivanagar, Bangalore.

If this post finds its way to the other side then probably i would believe it was real.

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welcome to the world that flatters to deceive.